Cover letter appraisal

[dash2free]

This is a cover letter that I designed for inquiring about employment possibilities.


"Your need for a motivated professional that is committed to delivering the firms products and services is a ideal match for my five years of real world experience as an customer service officer or management trainee but would be happy to consider other related positions within XY".

Banking and investment for me is not just an career that i want to start I enjoy financial services and there are some investment/ banking skills that need to be personalized by getting more experience. My interest in retail banking started through attending seminars while working in Canada. Since then, discussions with financial advisors and my own research along with personal investments in GIC's, mutual funds, stock market and learning debt management have confirmed my belief that this is a career which will enable me to use not only my interest in business and marketing but also my skills in working with people, both in a coaching and a advisory role.

Much of my experience is transferable specifically in the areas of sales, inventory management and customer service support; however, I look forward to learning broad areas of relationship banking, cross selling of banking products and services and banking principles." It was with interest I read in the Sunday Gleaner of ______________ that XY plans of restructuring aimed at enhancing customer service levels and improving operational efficiencies". Given the opportunity my confidence, experience and personal disposition would be an asset in attaining the company's goals.

For your convenience, attached is my resume for consideration. I would welcome the opportunity to participate in a personal interview to answer any questions and better present my qualifications. Thank you for your time and consideration. I look forward to speaking with you.
Sincerely,

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[cvsage]

This is very confident and high in energy, almost a little too pushy now, as shown by this sentence:

"Given the opportunity my confidence, experience and personal disposition would be an asset in attaining the company's goals."

You can know that you WOULD be an asset but you can know that you MIGHT be an asset. Do not overcook it, my friend or they'll ignore you as arrogant.

[dash2free]

In reviewing this sentence i must say that it could across as being a little arrogant. It's never my intention just trying to create a lasting impression. I would like to thank you for the advice however.

[dash2free]

instead could this sentence be used" I am confident that my experience and personal disposition would be valuable to your company"

[cvsage]

"I would hope that my.... might be...." is the truth.